Caution, slippery when wet. More like caution, painful when dry. I'm talking vaginas here.
If your vagina is dry, girl, get some lube. When on birth control, during menopause, post partum, while breastfeeding, or on chemotherapy, your estrogen levels plumit. Estrogen keeps your vagina moist and plump. Sorry, not sorry for using the word moist. Even if you don't feel dry, but sex hurts, get some lube.
Lube is a great start when sex hurts, but it isn't everything. If you haven't read this blog on why sex hurts, check it out.
There are times when friction is your friend, such as driving on snowy roads, rock climbing and swinging from the monkey bars.
And there are times when friction is your foe, such as skating, slip n slide and SEX.
Unless you find pleasure with rug burns, opt for a good lube. Why have sex with dry terrain?
Not all lube is created equal. Some are made with ingredients that can be harmful to your body such as parabens and phthalates. Also, you want to consider the base of lube: water, oil, or silicone before lathering it on your lady parts. Let's break things down for you.
Which base should you use?
Water based: This is a great first timer lube. It can be used with masturbation, intercourse and sex toys. It's easy to clean off you, your clothes and the sheets.
The endurance of water based lubes is short. It absorbs into your skin and evaporates, loosing its slip quality quicker than the other bases. So, as with your favorite summer SPF, you will need to reapply often if you have a lot of stamina between the sheets. Although the name might fool you, you can't use a water based lube in the shower, tub or any body of water as it will wash away leaving you feeling dry. And that's counterproductive.
Silicone based: If you are planning a marathon style sexual experience, consider a silicone based lube. A little goes a long way as it's long lasting. The long lasting action is great, until you are ready to wipe it off. You'll need to use soap and water for clean up, and you may be left with a silky residue on you, not necessarily a bad thing, just FYI.
Since this doesn't wash away easily with water, it's ideal to use in the shower or bath. Silicone based lubes have been known to stain sheets and clothing, so toss your clothes to the far corner of the room before sexy time.
Two warnings: 1) If you have hard wood floors, DO NOT spill it on them. You will find the floor quite slippery for months. 2) If you are using vibrators or sex toys made of silicone, this lube will break down the material overtime. So use water or oil based.
Oil based: Just like silicone, oil based lubes are like the energizer bunny, so if you keep going and going, this is your lube. You can use oil based in water, with sex toys (non latex), for massage, penetrative intercourse and masturbation.
One caveat for oil based lube: you can't use it with latex condoms (this includes coconut and olive oils, people). Broken condoms are not effective. Instead opt for the silicone based lube if you want a long lasting slip while using a latex condom. If you prefer oil based and want to use condoms, you can use a non-latex condom to avoid breakdown.
Ingredients
What you put in your vagina affects the health of your vaginal tissues.
Here's a list of ingredients to keep away from your va jay jay:
- Glycerin
- Preservatives: parabens, phthalates, chlorohexidine
- Additives: alcohols, stimulants , warming agents (i.e. propylene glycol), spermicides (i.e. nonoxynol-9) and flavourings scents
- Petroleum
Glycerin damages sensitive vaginal tissues and puts you at higher risk for infections. The glycerin in many lubes pulls moisture out, ultimately leaving you dry. Kind of ironic because its supposed to get you more wet, right? Yes, but only for a hot minute. It also feeds yeast, putting you at higher risk of getting yeast infections. You can do without that.
The above ingredients alter the vaginal ecosystem, making you more suseptible to infections such as yeast and bacterial vaginosis.
If you are trying to conceive, these ingredients throw off the vaginal pH making it harder for the sperm to survive. Instead, opt for a lube such as pre-seed which is made to create a friendly environment for sperm.
Don't be fooled by the wording "natural" on a bottle. It doesn't mean the ingredients are healthy for your vagina. Flip the bottle over and read the list of ingredients. Some lubes contain spermicide and this can irritate the delicate vaginal tissue, so I don't recommend it.
There is no one best lubricant for all women. Try a few and choose the best for you!
Here are some good lube brands:
- Yes Yes Yes
- Uberlube
- Good Clean Love
- Sustain
- Pre Seed
- Olive and Bee
- Sliquid Organics